Radiation Therapy - Week TEN

DAY TWO

D DAY

I couldn't help but smile broadly as I walked into the hospital for the very last time! Approaching the reception area I reflected absent-mindedly on my very first day ...

It was Friday 20th February 2008; it was raining, cold, and late in the afternoon when we were ushered into the Radiation Oncologists office. We were greeted with not one, but two doctors ... THAT started me thinking!

From the very outset, Dr. T impressed me, as forthright, empathetic and very well versed in his chosen field. What really impressed me, was his willingness to talk about 'any matter at all' and to do so with sensitivity AND complete honesty.

[Too many doctors think they are doing the patient a service by 'gliding the lily' (glossing over certain details) to save them (the patient) any unnecessary concerns. But, I maintain that it is the PATIENT'S right to determine what is or isn't unnecessary in regard to the treatment on offer.]

Dr T and I 'clicked' that day and I knew that I was in the right hands!

So much had taken place since that far off day, 3 months and 1 week distant from the present!


Back to the present...

It seemed that everyone that I encountered that day had the broadest of smiles!

It was as though everyone knew how excited I was, that this day, had finally come. Then again ... my own 'beaming smile' may have been a catalyst for others ... who knows?


The staff attending the Linear Accelerator that day, it seemed to me, were particularly pleased to see me. Each of them in their own way, had been a BIG part off my life for (what seemed like) such a long time now. Many of these individuals had accompanied me through the entire journey.

I must admit to shedding a tear or two at the thought of not seeing these wonderful people again. But fortunately, my excitement soon 'took centre stage once again' and I was 'ready for anything'!


My treatment (as usual) went particularly well and before I knew it ... IT was all over!!

Gathering around me, the RT's that I had come to love and respect all took turns in congratulating me on arriving at a successful outcome!!

The room was so emotion-charged, that it was quite difficult for me to eventually 'break the mood' and move out into the outer room; it was like leaving family behind!!

As I passed by the 'computer station', one of my favourite RT's called out to me: "I saw you break into a great big smile, as soon the the 'beam' was turned off for the last time, congratulations and GOOD luck"!!


As I walked out of the hospital for the last time, my mind was awash with memories.

My emotions meantime threatened to overwhelm me; as the excitement of completing my treatment, the very treatment that I was convinced was going to save my life, finally began to 'sink in'!!

After saying my goodbyes and promising to come back one last time, just before flying out of Australia to our new home in Chile, I set off with a new 'bounce in my step' into the bright sunlight that awaited me, ready for whatever new challenge might come my way!

Radiation Therapy - Week TEN

DAY ONE

All ... BUT!!

Arriving at the hospital, I was struck by the almost overwhelming sense of being so close to my final treatment, that I could barely contain my excitement!

In the back of my mind a familiar tape was playing: "37 down ... 1 to go"!

Greeting me, the receptionist commented: "Second last one ... John"?

To which I responded with a resounding: "YES!"


No time for a cup of tea

On my arrival at the dining room, I was surprised to see; not one, but two; Radiation Technicians waiting for me. Each, looking as excited as I felt!

"Are you ready"? They asked in unison, with more than a hint of collusion!

"Try and stop me"! Were the words that spilled out of my mouth ...

Next, I was whisked off to change (into my 'sexy' ... 'smiley face' ... hospital gown) and then ushered straight into the treatment room.


The Good-byes Start

"Hi Charlie".

I bellowed out as I greeted one of the nicest blokes you would be likely to meet anywhere. Charlie was an real 'old gentleman' with the emphasis on 'gentleman'.

Like many others of his vintage, this 'old digger' would only reluctantly accept being referred to as a gentleman; but he would not take kindly to the 'old bit'!

Although 83 years of age, Charlie was 'young at heart' and great fun to be around!

Charlie and I had bonded weeks before and had enjoyed swapping stories about our past and our hopes for the future.

It turned out, that we had lived for many years, in not one, but 3 different Sydney suburbs at the same time; but had never met ... until now!


"Good day ... mate" Charlie said in return, and then added: "This is your second last day isn't it"?

"Yup ... it sure is old mate"!


About 2 metres into 'the tunnel' that leads to the Linear Accelerator; Charlie and I exchanged 'Hi fives" and an emotional hug, we then reluctantly parted; Charlie to his home of 25 years and me to begin my second last treatment.


The treatment went very well; first the pelvic region (prostate treatment) and then the left breast and finally the right breast.

Immediately after treatment one of the newer young Radiation Technicians entered the room to prepare for the next patient.

"Buenos dias senor". "Buenos dias". I returned and followed by: "Como esta"?

To which she responded: "Muy bien, por favor".

We both laughed heartily ... another Spanish lesson was over, for yet another day.

Radiation Therapy - Week NINE

DAY FOUR

Boob Job

It turns out that the tracings of my boobs were not confined simply to posterity, they were also used to trace an exact replica (of my boobs) onto two large sheets of lead!

These were then 'cut out' (circular saw I suspect) to the shape of my left and right boobs (one for each) and were to be used to screen my chest, except for the areas indicated by the doctor's original sketchings!

I watched as these new 'shields' were snapped into place and then I was instructed to climb onto yet another 'incline gadget' only to be 'trussed up' again.

Then they lowered the 'boom' (actually they lowered one 'arm' of the Linear Accelarator) right onto my boob - alright then - a couple of millimitres clearance; I sure felt uncomfortable close!

The treatment itself lasted only about 8-10 seconds and was then repeated for the other breast.

Regular Radiation Treatment

Then it was time to 're-tool' for the prostate treatment. Before long, it was all over and I was no worse for the wear!

"Now ... back to work, I guess"!

Radiation Therapy - Week NINE

DAY THREE

Well today was the BIG day ... today I underwent a 'planning CT' (CT scan) as a precursor to further radiation treatment, this time on my chest!

It was quite a strange experience to be 'trussed up' on an 'incline board' hands and arms secured above my head - naked from the pelvis up!

But more 'strangeness' was to come!

Next I had a doctor drawing pictures of 'boobs' on my chest!

Stranger still these were then traced onto a sheet of clear plastic - no doubt to be preserved for posterity!!

I was told that I had 'breast buds' growing under my nipples and that this was the reason why my nipples were so sore.

A little weird, but it made sense, given that my testosterone production (assuming it was still happening) was 100% blocked and therefore the eostrogen that we all (male an female) have in our bodies was turning me, quite literally, into a female!!

I don't mind admitting, I was tempted to forego the treatment and be 'on hand' to 'breast feed' my grand daughter in Chile if needed ... imagine the possibilities!!

Well after all the planning was concluded; it was off for treatment number 35 ... leaving just 3 to go!!

No strangeness there, just more of the same that I had become so used to over the past couple of months or so!

Radiation Therapy - Week NINE

DAY TWO

Running Late

Arriving at the Oncology Unit early, there is always the chance that you could be offered treatment ahead of schedule - assuming that the unit is on time.

Of course the opposite is also possible ... they could be running well behind schedule and you have to sit there for hours!

Well today, turned out to be one of the latter!!

Fortunately, I was able to fill in some time chatting with staff; having morning tea; and later on, an early lunch.

By the time my treatment was ready, I was desperate to empty my bladder but (stubbornly) I held on because I wasn't going to go through all that again until my bladder was 'comfortably full'!!

The treatment itself was something of an anti-climax ... all over in 'the blink of an eye' (comparatively speaking) or 10 minutes in real time!!

Radiation Therapy - Week NINE

DAY ONE

Chaplain Come Here!

Some, say it's great to be in demand, to be looked up to and be sought after etc!Well maybe that's so in many cases, but not when you're undergoing Radiation Treatment and Hormone Treatment (becoming a female - literally) and struggling with fatigue; whilst still trying to cope with the pressures of work and preparing to relocate overseas!!

I mean ... I've got a lot on my mind at the moment and I really appreciate (more than ever) my own space.

On top of all that, we are currently living in a caravan in a friend's backyard in order to save a little money on rent etc. This means we are living out of suitcases and our routine has been 'turned on it's head'!

The upshot is, I try to limit my availabilty without causing offence - not an easy balance at times.


"Ahhh ... peace ... time to meditate, to rest, time to contemplate ... who am I kidding"?

"Mr Purcell ... how's our bladder today"?

"Not sure about yours ... but mine is ready for anything"! "Lead the way my young friend"!

Radiation Therapy - Week EIGHT

DAY FIVE

All was going well, I managed to jump the queue again by arriving early and my treatment was going well ... then it happened: The Linear Accelerator decided to break down!

I was not impressed!

I mean, there I was; naked except for my socks (you have to have some concessions) and my 'sexy' hospital gown and it was decidely cold!

We had successfully navigated through the CT Scan without any dramas, but upon resetting the Linear Accelerator for the Radiation Treatment ... well it just decided it needed a break!

Fortunately, with a few defts tweaks here and there the technicians were able to 'breath new life' into the decidely over-worked piece of (incredibly expensive) machinery.

Suffice to say, that we were underway in short order and I was no worse for the wear!

I kept muttering to myself: "32 down ... only 6 to Go"!!

It helped!!

Radiation Therapy - Week EIGHT

DAY FOUR

Hospital Chaplain

Somehow word had spread arouund the Oncology Unit, that I had been a Hospital Chaplain for many, many years. Well, it's amazing how many people have started to seek me out for 'chat'.

Today an elderly doctor's wife 'cornered me' literally. I had only spoken to her briefly the day before and today she had escaped my cursory glance an arrival and waited until I turned in her direction ...

"Hello there, you just come and sit over here ... there's lot's I want to tell you"!

Well, as it happened the treatments were running well behind and I had nearly 45 minutes with my 'new best friend'!

Now don't get me wrong, I love to be able to help others where I can but this felt a little more like I was her personal Chaplain!

Fortunately, my turn for treatment arrived in the 'nick of time' before the conversation became too intense and I was off for treatment number 31 ... yay!

My treatment continues to 'go perfectly' according to the weekly review appraisal I received immediately after treatment.

No complaints here ... except ... where's that Chaplain, I want a word with him ...!!

Radiation Therapy - Week EIGHT

DAY THREE

Too Good to be True

Well the day started off like so many others … but ended quite differently!

My trip to the Hospital went without incident, and with the usually formalities over, I made my way to the kitchen for my regular ‘cup of tea’.

With morning tea over, and the time ‘getting on’ I decided to head off to get changed.

So far, so good!

Now, regular readers will know that I have had nothing but praise for the staff of the Radiation Oncology Department (apart from one minor hiccup over phone details). But that’s now changed!

After changing, I headed to the ‘chairs’ to await my appointment … my presence meant that there were now four of us waiting there.

Then it happened … an ‘over-efficient’, ‘strictly-by-the-book’, ‘do-as-I-tell-you’ type nurse came by and starting quizzing the four of us as to what we were doing there!

Well, it turned out that the new (Acting) NUM had decided that a maximum of two patients could wait there; the rest would have to return to the outer waiting room, where we would be sitting amongst every ‘Tom, Dick and Harry who waltzed into the place – in our rather sexy hospital gowns!!

Well, being in a nice mood, I conceded to the request along with one of the women who had also trespassed!

Now as it happened, a few minutes later a young trainee came and ushered me back to the (inner) waiting area, where I once again took a seat!

Just as the young trainee disappeared from view … there she was again!!

“What are you doing back in here”?

“This time, I was given a special invitation”!

“Well you know you shouldn’t be here …”

“Just a minute where do you think you are going … “apparently another person had attempted to ‘sneak in’ but nurse: “I’m-the-boss”, doesn’t miss a trick!

“Now you just stay right there …”

“Mr. Purcell you can come in now”! ‘Thanks”!

“Now where did that other one go”?

Radiation Therapy - Week EIGHT

DAY TWO

False Start

Ring … ring … ring!

“Hello …”

“Hi this is the Radiation Oncology Department … we are running very late so it’s probably not worth your coming until we ring back”.

“OK …” “Well that was unexpected …”

Ahem ...

Ring … ring … ring!

“Hello …”

“Hi this is the Radiation Oncology Department … we’ve caught up quite a bit so come on in … but don’t rush”.

‘What the heck … I’ll go in at the regular time and … ‘take a punt’’!


On Arrival

“Mr. Purcell”?

“Yes.”

“If your bladder is ready you can come right on in.”

“Thanks … lead the way”!

What was that all about … sheesh!

The rest of the day went pretty much according to plan and I left the hospital chanting:

“29 down 9 to go”!!

Radiation Therapy - Week EIGHT

DAY ONE

Running Behind

Well today was certainly ‘back to normal’ … the queue in front of me, was a sure indication that I was in for a late day.

In order to pass some time, I arranged for my weekly (Doctor’s) review to be brought forward. The good news continues on this front: “All is going perfectly”!

Apparently, I am tolerating the treatment ‘perfectly’; meaning I’m not suffering from any of the multitude of side effects that normally attend 38 Prostate Cancer Radiation treatments.

The weekly CT scans (usually the last treatment day of the week) also show that the treatment is working perfectly!

On another note, my Oncologist has arranged for 3 Radiation Treatments on my chest.

Apparently, the most effective way to deal with ‘man boobs’, is to ‘zap’ them. Guess I should cancel those trainer bras!!

Another milestone passed today also … today was treatment number 28; meaning that I have only 10 treatments to go!

And so today, I started the countdown in earnest!!


10... 9 … 8 … 7 … 6 …5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1 … ZERO!!

Radiation Therapy - Week SEVEN

DAY FOUR

Back to NORMAL

I can hear somebody already asking: "But what is normal"?

"I'm glad you asked ... in my case normal goes something like this..."

10:00am drive to hospital ... arrive 10:30am.

Log in (more accurately 'scan in' ... high tech stuff!).

Stir the girls at the reception desk.

Sign for parking permit.

Place parking permit in the van and head off to the kitchen.

Make cup of tea, grab some biscuits and chat to whoever is silly enough to sit near me!

Wait for a technician to come and get me.

Get changed into 'sexy' hospital gown.

enter 'the room' and wait to be 'microwaved'!!

Get changed ... a much better look!

Have some lunch - don't have the energy to rive immediately after
treatment.

Return parking permit.

Stir the girls at the reception desk.

Head off ... back to work!!

PHEW I'm tired just thinking about it!

By the way, my treatment is continuing to go without a hitch - even the word perfectly has been bandied about!

No complaints here!

Radiation Therapy - Week SEVEN

DAY THREE ... DEJAVU ...???


GOOD MORNING

"How's your bladder going"?!

Those were the words of greeting offered by the young staff trainee.

Of course, not to be in any way offensive; I responded ... yes, you guessed it...

"Not bad ... how's yours"?!

Of course, we both had a bit of a chuckle afterwards.

Then came the invitation...

"You can come straight through if you like"?

'If I like?! Hmm, let me see it's 10:30am, I'm not 'due' for another 45 minutes ... my bladder is comfortably full ... but I haven't had my regular cup of tea yet ...'?

"Lead the way.."!


ZOOM ... ZOOM

I was no sooner changed ...

"You can come straight in, Mr Purcell."


IN ...OUT ... and ON my WAY

Just like that it was all over and I was on my way!

IT SEEMS AS THOUGH ONE DAY IS BECOMING A CARBON COPY OF THE PREVIOUS ONE???


One more and I 'm thinking about registering for 'Ground Hog Day' rights!

Radiation Therapy - Week SEVEN

DAY TWO

GOOD MORNING

"How's your bladder going"?!

Those were the words of greeting offered by the young staff trainee.

Of course, not to be in any way offensive; I responded ... yes, you guessed it...

"Not bad ... how's yours"?!

Of course, we both had a bit of a chuckle afterwards.

Then came the invitation...

"You can come straight through if you like"?

'If I like?! Hmm, let me see it's 10:30am, I'm not 'due' for another 45 minutes ... my bladder is comfortably full ... but I haven't had my regular cup of tea yet ...'?

"Lead the way.."!


ZOOM ... ZOOM

I was no sooner changed ...

"You can come straight in, Mr Purcell."


IN ...OUT ... and ON my WAY

Just like that it was all over and I was on my way!

Radiation Therapy - Week SEVEN

DAY ONE

The Day that should not have BEEN.

Today, I arrived at the hospital as usual, about 45 minutes before my treatment was scheduled. As per my ritual, I made myself a cup of tea and sat down to chat to some of the other patients.

Lo and behold, one of the staff came out to meet me and said:

"You're not supposed to be here today"!!

To which I replied: "Yes I am"!

Well ... after some time, it turned out that we were both right!

I was correct in that this was indeed a scheduled treatment day for me; but apparently other (senior) staff had tried to ring me to tell me NOT to come in, as they were so far behind!

As sometimes happens, Linear Accelerator No.3 was down and being repaired. Therefore patients (the most needy) were being sent over to No.1 Linear Accelerator. I guess I was one of those chosen to be able to forgo today's treatment to facilitate the above.

With that settled, I was invited to get changed and wait and the staff would find a way to squeeze me in!

I had just settled back to wait my turn, when one of those 'over-efficient administrative types' approached me ...

Her first words were: "You're not supposed to be here today"!

I then attempted to explain what had taken place ... but 'super-efficient pencil-pusher extraordinaire' interrupted with:

"Excuse me, but the staff tried ringing you several times ... you shouldn't be here! They tired your home number and your mobile number. If you give us your contact numbers, the onus is on you to be available"!

To which I replied: "I'm sorry but they probably missed me at home because I leave early ..."

And then ... interrupting again:

"They would have tried your mobile several times. It's not good enough to have it off"!

Now that did it!

"Listen ... I've been very patient, but I received NO calls on my mobile, I'll go and get it if you like!!! I suggest you check your own records to see if you have the correct contact details before you start making unfounded accusations"!

Stomp ... stomp ... stomp ... faded the footsteps of Miss "I'm never wrong".

Shortly afterwards a somewhat apologetic figure approached me with a feeble attempt at an apology ... simply saying:

"It was our error ... we'll correct it".

And then a the rather disgruntled "Miss Not-so-efficient" ... toddled off into the distance ... never to be heard from again!

Oh, in case you're interested; my treatment went very well again today and the Onocologist said that my treatment was progressing perfectly! All in all a pretty good day!

Radiation Therapy - Week SIX

DAY FIVE

Time sure is flying these days! Here it is treatment number 23 with only 15 to go and I wonder where all the time has gone!

Don't get me wrong; I'm more than happy that the time is going quickly, I can't wait to see my daughter and grandchildren again.

On the other hand, it's strange that somehow life is speeding by while I desperately want to saviour every moment of every day ... so much more these days.

Every day for me now is precious!!

Once again my treatment went off without a hitch! The team who supervise my treatment are absolutely marvellous.

I've been wondering, just how I'm going to express my gratitude (adequately) when my treatment is over. I'm actually thinking of writing some prose or perhaps a poem - not sure yet!

Hmm... maybe a short play ...?

Who knows, I'll think of something!

Radiation Therapy - Week SIX

DAY FOUR

It's a little strange, attending for treatment these days; as all of the 'usual crowd' have finished their treatment and scattered in all directions back to their home towns.

Many of these, were being accommodated at a lodge in Sydney; as they live in relatively remote locations. I'm sure there have been many 'welcome home parties in the past week or two - all over the state.

There's certainly ... no place like HOME!

So these days, I'm about making new friends, at least until my treatment is finished on 28th this month! Then, I guess with one chapter over; I'll begin in ernest planning the next!

For those who are regular readers of this blog site, you will be aware that it's full steam ahead for our plans to move to Chile.

Well, my treatment went well again today and I said goodbye to treatment number 22 and looked forward to only 16 more to go!